116. 4 Ways to Take the Power Back!

Eric is Over "it", Kate is confused about what he means, disagreements over the words "self-love", and diving into how to improve your relationship with Yourself!

Topics

➡️ The power of saying "NO"

➡️ Preventing your fears from running your life

➡️ Healthy Mind, Strong Body, Open Heart

➡️ Experiencing Joy

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FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT

Kate MacDougall
Today, we're talking about getting your power back.

Eric MacDougall
Yeah, yeah. And so we really wanted to dive into a little more of the self. Yeah, in these episodes, we are just finishing up our series really about relationships, right in terms of love, romance, and polarity. And when we had conversations about what we wanted to talk about, in the following episodes, we really want it to be about us as an individual. Right. And so really making that a focus. So if you're out there, and you're listening, this is really about, you know, obviously, improving yourself as an individual focusing on yourself giving yourself a bit of self love. But you can talk about that term and how much I dislike it. But the idea here is to really make yourself the focus during this episode, and understanding that by doing that, you will create healthier relationships, right, not only in your marriage with your kids and work, etc. We are relational beings, we're always in relationship. But the reality is, is we really want to focus more on what was going on for ourselves as individuals.

Kate MacDougall
Yeah. And I think your relationship with yourself is the most important relationship in your life. Because when you're not comfortable with yourself as a person, or you have dislikes towards yourself, it doesn't matter how much people compliment you love on you, whatever, you're just not open to it, you're unable to receive those things, because you're too busy not believing them, because you're like, Well, I don't think these things about me. So how could anybody possibly think these things about me? So I think that's why we really wanted to go there with these are the these next episodes, because it's such an essential part of a relationship.

Eric MacDougall
Yeah, I agree. And so today, we're gonna talk about four kind of priorities that we have in our lives as individuals in order to elevate ourselves, I guess, like, get a little more woke, if you will. But the idea here is to simplify it for you, and really do a bit of an introduction around these four ideas. So we're not gonna go deep into this idea of like, the shadow and getting in touch with yourself in that case, or anything like that. We're really just gonna talk about four pretty simple ways for you to start getting your power back, focusing on accepting yourself advocating yourself and really giving yourself a bit of love and respect, which is important if you want to be able to eventually receive that from another person.

Kate MacDougall
Yeah, and I'm going to openly talk about self love, because it's not a word that bothers me. But Eric, you've always been the kind of guy who walks to the beat of his own drum, you've never been like, follow the lead, follow the pack, you've always kind of done your own thing your own way. And right now, the term self love is very popular in social media. It's like everyone's talking about it. Everyone's using it and not always, in the most correct ways.

Eric MacDougall
Yeah, and maybe not like, I guess for me, the simplest way to put it is that and again, no offense to hippies, no offense, people who love giving group hugs. That sounds kind of like just a big hippie group hug. Yeah. And to me, it's what I'm seeing a lot when people talk about self love is there's not really any actionable steps behind it and saying, Oh, love yourself and your life will get way better whom by

Kate MacDougall
thing? Yeah, like, Yeah, let's all sit in a circle and sing phones, and we're all gonna love each other automatically. It's just gonna happen.

Eric MacDougall
Yeah, let's just like avoid the challenging things that we're all facing in our lives by like, just being this self love anyways, not to get into it. But yeah, feel free, use that term.

Kate MacDougall
Just go with it. I love it.

Eric MacDougall
So the first probably, I'd say most important, but also probably the hardest, is what we're gonna start with. Yeah. And that is learn how to say no,

Kate MacDougall
the no word. Yeah, that's a hard word. Especially if you were brought up in a way that saying no, is rude or saying no. is selfish.

Eric MacDougall
Yeah. Looking at all your people pleasers out there. Yeah, that's me. Yeah. And so this is really important. Now, a lot of times what happens when we talk about this? You know, say no, immediately people start getting their heads and like, well, what does that mean? I say no, and everything. And it's like, no, absolutely not. We have a saying in our family. And, you know, that really helps us, which is, what do I have to say no to in order to say yes to things that are most important to me. The reality is, is that a lot of us were saying yes to things, or probably importantly, we're not saying no to things. And that often leads to irritation, resentment, burnout, we're betraying ourselves sometimes, right? By saying, Yes, I'm looking at women out there who are fulfilling their partner's sexual desire, even though it's causing them pain, discomfort, they don't enjoy it, probably something you should say no. And then open up that conversation about what pleasure means to you. I'm talking about people who, you know, are just allowing themselves to be treated badly, who are allowing themselves to be insulted, taken advantage of right, all these things, because they're afraid to say no, and the belief that they have around what it means to say No,

Kate MacDougall
exactly. And oftentimes, you know, I know for myself, and possibly most women out there, it's like, we feel this obligation to be the best at every job, quote, unquote, that we have in our lives, we want to be the best mom, the best friend, the best daughter, the best sister, the best wife, the best. Everything employee, like we want to be the best at our jobs. And, and by doing that, we're saying yes to everything, our kid is like, Come and play with me Come and jump with me on the trampoline, and I'm exhausted, but I'll do it, I'll get up on the traveling and I'll jump with them. And I'm gonna, like, grind my teeth doing it. And then I'm gonna become angry at them, and I'm gonna grow resentment. And then a few minutes later, my husband asks me to, you know, give him a massage or spend time with him. And then I'm like, oh, like, I have nothing left for you. Because I gave everything to work today. And I came home, the kids needed me and then you needed me. And I feel like, oftentimes I get into conversation with my women who feel overworked, underappreciated, super tired. And I'm not saying this is like exclusive to women. I'm sure this is a I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but this is probably feeling men get to, but it's just we often feel like there's too much going on. And there's too many people pulling at us at every angle. And it's exhausting. But really, when you step back and think about it, what are you saying no to? Yeah, how much? Are you saying yes? versus how much? Are you saying no? And when you are saying yes. Is it truly a? Yes. And I really feel like this aligns with who I am. And what I want to be doing right now? Or are you just saying yes, because if I don't do this, I'm going to be judged, or I'm going to be, you know, not appreciated, or I'm not going to be the best mom, or the best this or the best that. So when you're saying yes. What does that yes look like? What is the reason? You're saying? Yes? And how many times are you actually saying no,

Eric MacDougall
yeah. And I think I love that you're saying that, and I can touch base on that idea of women and the pressure they feel. And I can appreciate and respect that. I think, in general, we have raised society women who is essentially told to be all you need to be the amazing employee, the CEO, the amazing wife, the sex goddess, the beautiful mother, like all these things. And what often happens is women end up sacrificing who they are at the core, right? So their relationship with themselves is the first to go because their natural caretakers, they want to give love. They want to share all these amazing gifts with the world. But they have essentially been told that you have to do everything for everybody at the sacrifice of yourself. And I think that that is a behavior that needs to be unlearned. Again, I'm not a woman. But what I will say You know, even in our relationship, I see it sometimes. And you know, I hate to say this and say it out loud, because I hope you'll use it against me eventually. Yeah. But in our relationship, you are essentially like the safety net, when it comes to especially the kids. Yeah. Right. And what I mean by that is that, in the end, I have a little more of a buffer, because I know that I can drop the ball and Kate will jump in. And I think there's a certain pressure on you, as a mother, as a wife, as the maternal in this home to take on and say, I am the last resort. Like if after me, there is nothing, there's nothing. Yeah. And so I constantly need to be on guard, as opposed to I'm speaking for myself here, I'm calling myself out that I sometimes have that idea of like, I'm kind of tired, you know, if I just kind of like, don't do it. Cadle actually. And I hate to say that, but it's the truth. Yeah. And I think it's the truth in a lot of relationships, right? Yes. I'm a father who's implicated I yeah, I like to clean up around the house, I like to do my share all that stuff. But in the end, when we are both extremely exhausted, I usually have the buffer, if you will, I disabled kind of the upper hand, because I know that you will eventually be there to pick me up.

Kate MacDougall
Yeah. And for me, it took a lot of practice for me to learn to say no, for me to learn to be like, I'm going to prioritize myself right now. And the way that that came out was, like this big understanding of, I really need to do this for myself, in order to show up as my best self as a wife as my best self as a mom as my best self as a teacher in every other aspect of my life. I can't be a good friend or sister if I'm exhausting myself. So I have learned to say no, in other ways without saying the word no, because it's still difficult for me. It's still something I need to practice. I'll be like pneumonia. Like, maybe like, like, maybe, like, I still say that. But it happened tonight. I set a clear like, and it wasn't a no, but it was very clear that I am not doing this. They're not happening. And you had, we took separate vehicles to my parents house. I had been with the kids all day because you were working and I'm on summer break. And before leaving the house, you handed me the truck keys to where the kids are. And you were like, Alright, see when we get home? And I was like, Ah, no, no. Like, here's the truck keys. Have been with the kids all day. Like Mama needs a little 15 minute drive on my own. Yeah. And I didn't say that. It was just a clear like, here are the truck.

Eric MacDougall
Yes. You're like, you're gonna take the truck. Yeah, I'm gonna take the car,

Kate MacDougall
the car? And there was no question. I think there was like that understanding of like, okay, well, yeah, I

Eric MacDougall
think for me, it was a great opportunity for me to say like, oh, yeah, awesome. Like, I'll help you out. Right? There was no like, oh, well, what's fair, what's not like, I don't think we play that game in a relationship. But this idea of like, okay, well, it's time on our own. What a great opportunity for her to get it. Yeah, my driving home, right.

Kate MacDougall
And I understood that I have every power to drive home, I could totally do that. Like, What's five more minutes with the kids, it's not gonna kill me. But in that moment, I knew that I was not going to show up as my best mom in the vehicle. Because I had a few things going on in my own head. And I just needed the quiet. So I knew that the healthiest thing for my family in that moment and for myself was to say, you take the kids?

Eric MacDougall
Yeah. And so as we kind of wrap up this first one, it really is. I mean, it's a courageous step. To say no, and you can take practices. You know, I remember when I was practicing this one of my coaches, I'd have to go and try to get 10 nose a day, right at first kind of started home. But then I realized, like, wow, like, it's kind of hard, actually, for me to go out somewhere and like, get people ask me things, and for me to say no, actively. And so I would actually go out of my way to try to say no to people. And that I get I know from people well get to know that was part of the group as well, it was 1010. But so yeah, get an O from people because I also didn't like receiving no. But I essentially had to come to terms with this idea that no was not this bad word. Right? We came up with a joke of like, go for no. And I don't want to get too deep into this idea of like asking people for things and allowing them saying no, because we're really focusing on your ability to say no, but I get it. It takes courage. The reality is that it's the only way to create bandwidth and space for yourself. It's your responsibility to advocate for yourself. And saying no, is one of the big first steps in that.

Kate MacDougall
Absolutely. And now if we move on to the second priority, something that we've made a priority in our life is really the idea of getting in touch with your fears, knowing what they are understanding where they come from understanding their impact on your life.

Eric MacDougall
Yeah, this is a really great one. And when we do a lot of work with men in the mastermind, this is where we go to all the time, right? We talk about our fears, we talk about things like attachment fears, feared futures like We really get into this idea because so we, as human beings have survived for so long because we have this fear response, right. So we are very aware of our environment all the time, because we're designed to survive. And so as much as I hate to say it, a lot of our decision making is based on fear, we're often trying to prevent something, avoid something that is like the first response. And so when you can start to understand and create a deep relationship with your fears, right, you can get this idea of like, the shadow, and I won't get too deep into that. But essentially, they bring these fears that are usually unconscious to the forefront, you start to understand how they really run your life. And when you can see that now you can actually start to play with them, courageously overcome them take action, despite your fears. But if you are not aware of your fears, they will be running your life, whether you want to or not,

Kate MacDougall
right, and understanding your fears gives you this power over them, you can still have the fear, it can still be something that you're going to live with and possibly have to live with your whole life, depending on how deep that fear is. But understanding it and knowing it and being able to point it out like, Oh, I'm feeling this fear right now. Like, that's where this is coming from. Oftentimes you don't fears will show up as anger. Yep. Because oftentimes, when you're feeling angry about something, you're your spouse did something or your coworker or whoever did something, all of a sudden you feel angry about it? Well, if you really look deep down inside, that anger is showing up. Under that anger, there is fear showing up, you're scared of something happening or something not happening, because of the situation that's going on,

Eric MacDougall
right. And when you're experiencing that fear in your body, you tend to jump into panic. And like you're saying for some people's response, when they panic, it's anger for the people that say shut down, they still know exactly avoid the people please, right? And when you can start to understand what exactly are my fears? You know, I'll give an example. So one of the fears that I think a lot of us have is this fear of being alone, right, comes from this attachment, fear of like being unloved, being unworthy, not being enough, etc. But people have a deep fear of being alone. And oftentimes we get in relationships, when they're really unhealthy. Our fear of being alone takes over. And now we're no longer thinking straight. So we're living in constant fight or flight. And so a lot of you know what I meant when I talked to men and I first got them, they are so focused on trying to prevent their marriage from ending, because they don't want to be alone, right? And they're not even able to create a healthier relationship, because they can't even talk about the fear of being alone, and what that feels like. And so what do they do, they kind of run around in circles over and over again, they solve every problem that just shows up right in front of them. And they never kind of step back understand the big picture of like, Hmm, actually, what is my fear here? Oh, it's being alone? Well, how much time do I spend alone? It? Why is it scared for me to be alone? What does that mean? Right. And then when you start to essentially bring the fear into the light, it gets less scary, right? That doesn't mean that that fear is just gonna dissipate and go away forever, you might still have that fear for your entire life. But it actually becomes something that's much more approachable. And that allows you to make healthier decisions, because you're not in this constant panic mode, because you understand what's happening. Right? And

Kate MacDougall
being able to pinpoint your fears, also helps you it helps you be able to stop looking at everything in your life and making it a truth that validates that fear, right? So serum say my fear is being alone. Like, and I don't really think about it, all of a sudden, you know, everything's gonna start happening. And I'm gonna start thinking, Well, you know, the other day, Eric left, and he left 15 minutes early, and he didn't really tell me where he was going, Oh, and that day, you know, I was I was sitting alone in the staff room at work, and I really didn't like that. And all of those things are going to come out and they're going to be intensified. But if I'm aware that my deep fears to be alone, I can be like, well, of course, those moments seem dramatic, seem drastic, in the moment, because it's a trigger for me. Yeah. But it was like 15 minutes, I was alone for five minutes in the staff room. Like, that doesn't mean anything about me doesn't mean anything about my colleagues or Eric. It's just maybe that next time I'll do something differently. Like instead of going to the staff room on my own, I can go see if my friend is ready and meet her in her classroom or go see, go talk to Eric and say, like, hey, when you left 15 minutes early, it really triggered that fear. And I know it sounds silly, but if you could you just let me know where you're going next time that I'd really appreciate that and it would just like, help alleviate some of that fear. I'm feeling

Eric MacDougall
Yeah, absolutely. And so I love this idea of getting in touch with your fears is really important. And again, I think oftentimes for a lot of us, we fear we fear getting lost in them. The idea here is just to understand them understand they're a part of you, they're part of your human experience, you are a human being, therefore you have fears, understanding what they are and how they run your life in the background. So you can bring them to the forefront and really face them, to work with them, and then create an amazing life despite them. The third one, and I think this is a very common one, we've talked about it before, but it's this idea of your habits and behaviors, and really focusing on you know, making sure that they are healthy and aligned with the life you're trying to create. When we talk about this in the group that I write, and we talk about Healthy Mind, Strong Body open heart, right? And so really, it is mental, physical, emotional. And so for us, the Healthy Mind is what's happening in your brain, right? What's running a loop? Are you just constantly judgmental? Are you constantly anger? Are you constantly, you know, irritated by everything, looking at the world with glass half full approach? Do you think everything's catastrophic? That's what's happening in your brain, right? So that's the Healthy Mind approach what's happening in your mind, the body is your nervous system. And this is, I think a lot of people overlook this, right? When we talk about strong body within our workout all the time, not even, you need to understand that your body is part of you. And if you're stressed out all the time, if your breathing is shallow, if your blood pressure's crazy up, that will impact not only your brain, it's gonna impact the way that you're showing up in life. It's going to impact your response. Yeah, all that stuff. And so that's the idea of a strong body. Are you getting enough sleep? What's your breathing? Like? Do you? Or do you have stillness in your life? Right? Are you getting sunlight? Like all these ideas? Exercise is part of it. But I just hate when I say strong bodybuilding, I gotta work out every day. And it's like, well, I mean, that might benefit you. But yeah, the idea, it's way more than just working

Kate MacDougall
exactly in the working out doesn't necessarily mean we're building muscle, we're getting stronger, we want to lose weight, whatever. Moving your body daily actually helps you move through those emotions and and, you know, shift that tension, you might be feeling from stress to actually tension you're feeling from lifting away. And so it's it moves that kind of physical feeling to something more realistic for your body.

Eric MacDougall
Yeah, that's right. And it really allows you to get out of your head. Right. And this is what's happening a lot is, we have created a system in our lives where oftentimes we're immobile. So we're not moving constantly. And therefore the only thing that's really moving is our brain, right? And so it's, it's running on autopilot all the time, it's running at high efficiency, and it's taking up a lot of energy. And what we want to do instead is start take that energy and spread it throughout our body, right with this movement, get the blood flowing, get the muscle flowing. And then what that does is it takes you out of your head and brings you into your body. Just like if you started doing box breathing, or if you got down into 20 Push ups, you would start to feel different things in your body. And now your attention would go from ruminating about everything that's bad to Oh, wow, like my muscles are sore, and oh, I'm feeling my breath, my breath is shallow. And so immediately your attention shifts, because you're in your body and you're connected to your nervous system. And then the last one is really about having an open heart. Right. And we've talked about this in the last episode in terms of like practicing love, being open, being vulnerable, being real. I see a lot of people and I get it, it's hard to talk about some of these subjects sometimes. But the reality is, I see a lot of people talking about things that is totally irrelevant to the human experience. And I think we really need to learn the skill to talk about what's on our heart, right to talk about what we're feeling, the emotions, the vulnerabilities, the the ideas, the thoughts that we make up in our heads about ourselves in a safe space.

Kate MacDougall
Yeah, I think I think that was one of my go twos is you? You're definitely I think a lot of people do this, but you go to booksmart stuff, or, well, once I read this thing, or I once I heard this thing about this and that and the other thing, you know, somebody is like, tell me about your relationship. And it's like, well, I read this article the other day, and then and then and then you're like, Okay, tell me about your relationship. Oh, it's good. You know, but, you know, we've been married for 10 years, and I read this article about like, married couples, and it's just like, holy, jeez, man, can you talk about yourself in your heart? Like, are you even in touch with this? And so if you recognize yourself in that, which I used to do, like Eric would say, like, babe, why are you angry? Well, you know, I It's psychologically speaking, wobble a lot. And I'd go into this book smart stuff, and you'd be like, Kate, talk to me about your heart. I want to see you I really want to see you. I don't care what it says in a book or what someone psychologist or podcast said, like, I want to see how that impacted you.

Eric MacDougall
Absolutely. And I think we often hide behind that, right. We hide behind the logical understanding of our experience, like you're saying, and it's kind of a safe place for us to be right because, you know, people typically it's like, oh, how are you feeling? Yeah, you say a bunch of smarts and I'm like, I guess this person gets it. It's all good. And the other thing that I see a lot, and again, listener, you might catch yourself doing this because I do it to you do we all do it. But it's this idea that when somebody asks us how we're feeling or what's going on for us, and instead of talking about our internal experience, we run them through our life over the past four days, right? Oh, let me tell you what happened the other day, and then this happened. And you're essentially just telling them like a movie of your life. Yeah. And instead, you could very quickly create connection and be open and probably feel better. If you're like, I'm, to be honest, I'm kind of feeling a bit heavy. Today. This is what's going on inside me. And these are some of the thoughts that I've had lately. Instead of being like, Oh, I went to the grocery store, do they, and on Tuesday, this happened. And then that happened, and this happened. And that person said this, and, and we realizing, after 20 minutes, like, wow, I don't really feel connected to you at all. And we didn't really talk about anything, I didn't really

Kate MacDougall
need a rundown of your week, I just kind of wanted to know how you were doing.

Eric MacDougall
Yeah. And so this is really the skill of practicing openness, practicing vulnerability. And again, do it in a safe space, right? Don't walk around your neighborhood and start puking on your challenges on everybody. I don't know if that's appropriate. But really find a safe space and take responsibility for the way that you do it. And so, when you are creating habit, and you are focusing on behaviors, think about that idea, right? How do I get healthier mind? How do I get a stronger body? And how do I open my heart to another person that's really safe and secure, that I can do it too. And then the last one, the fourth one, and the most fun one, is really doing things for yourself, that bring you joy. And I want to speak to a little bit of this because I remember a couple years ago, somebody asked me this question. I was like being coached or something and hear what's brings you joy. And I was like, so dumbfounded by the question. I was like, What do you enjoy? What does that like? Who needs that? I'm not here to like find joy. I'm here to like, solve all my problems and figure things out

Kate MacDougall
that and you're also like, Well, I'm happy writing what brings me joy. Like I'm happy. I'm I'm happy. Yeah. Okay, so what are you doing that's making you happy?

Eric MacDougall
And then you just go to the things Oh, my marriage? My kids. My Yeah,

Kate MacDougall
exactly. The like book textbook answers, right. It's like, okay, so what are you specifically doing that brings you joy? Yeah. And well, hard to answer.

Eric MacDougall
100%. And what we're talking about here is to take it one level deeper. And think about actions, things that you do, right? That bring you the feeling of joy. Right? Not somebody some somebody tells you not something somebody tells you sorry to do that should bring you joy, or thinks brings you joy, right. But literally things where you feel joy when you are experiencing the moment Right.

Kate MacDougall
And for women out there, what brings you joy, not what brings your kids joy. Oh, it was so nice to see them happy on the beach the other day, like, I felt like shit and was exhausted the whole time. But at least they were happy.

Eric MacDougall
Yeah. validated me as a mom. That's not joy. Well, yeah, that's like separate thing that's separate. But we're talking about something specific that you do or yourself. Yeah. And the best way to think about it is, how does the adult version of you take care of the inner kid in you? Yeah. Right. And so for me, and again, this could be different for everyone. There's no right or wrong way for you to experience joy as long as I'm bringing harm to anybody. But the idea like we joke about it a lot. Which kid thinks it's weird. Like, I love going to movies on my own. Right? I go to the theater on my own. And I remember we first met you're like, that is the weirdest thing ever. Like I want to go my own

Kate MacDougall
assaulting. I want to sit there and ask you a bunch of questions during the movie, but you won't let me

Eric MacDougall
know. I really enjoy the movie experience on my own now. You know, I like watching movies with you. I like watching movies with you. And I got to watch the kids. But there is something that brings me joy to have the movie experience on my own.

Kate MacDougall
Yeah. And it doesn't necessarily mean that things that bring you joy need to be done on your own. That's right. Yeah. But they need to be truly done for you. You know, if I go out with my girlfriends, and we go and do something that's bringing me joy, that's okay. That counts. You know, it's not because I was with my girlfriends. It didn't bring me joy because I had to share the experience not at all. It can be a moment where you're with your spouse or when you're with your kids. But did it truly bring you joy did the inner child and you get a little excited that the butterflies go and you were like, this is kind of cool, like Yeah, so like the other day we we went on tree for like an obstacle course in the tree trees and we did some ziplining and that truly brought me joy. It brought me joy to see how much you when the kids were enjoying it. It brought me joy to see the kids you know being perseverant and having fun, but it brought me joy to to do something I've always kind of been curious about I've heard about this place. And I was like, I don't know what this is like so I'm glad I'm very glad that I tried it and it brought me joy to be there.

Eric MacDougall
Yeah. And so what we're really talking about here is you reconnecting to your feeling of joy, right and create it environments, create situations take action for yourself, to bring more joy to your life, right? Whatever that looks like for you. It's very personal. But again, that is what you want to create in your life, create pockets of it doesn't mean you have to be joyful all the time. It means that in some aspects your life, you need to create more joy, so that you can continue to persevere deal with the challenges that life brings to you. And really experience this beauty. Right, the amazing thing we call life.

Kate MacDougall
Yeah. And I know for me, it was really hard to connect with that joy because I wanted to do the right thing. And if I'm going to take a day for myself, or I'm going to take an hour for myself, like it better be the thing that's going to bring me joy, because I'm trying here, I'm really trying here. I was putting so much pressure on myself to try and find the perfect way to get me joy. Did I try 1011 things that really didn't bring me joy that I thought would bring me joy? did I waste money on a bunch of activities or memberships? or projects that I did that really didn't bring me joy that I never completed or whatever? Yeah. But the goal here was to try and discover what it was that brought me joy. And in order to do that, it's important to take risks to improvise, to try to not be afraid to like, you know, think outside the box and just do something. Just do something. Start by doing something.

Eric MacDougall
Yeah, you're so sexy right now.

Kate MacDougall
Thank you. Yeah, take a lot of courage. Oh, my gosh, look at you getting out of it.

Eric MacDougall
That's right. So just to recap, you know, the big four for us are Learn to say no, get in touch with your fears. Think about healthy habits and behaviors you can implement your life. And then really bring more of the experience of joy to your life. Follow through on one or two of these things to start, right. You don't have to do them all at once. Start small, take one step at a time. Go 1% every day and you're gonna realize your life is gonna start to change.